Saturday, November 04, 2006

Fly Power

AIRPLANE WITH FOUR ENGINES:-


Take a wooden matchstick and slice a thin sliver
from one side. Then cut the remaining stick in two, lengthwise. Make sure you
leave a little of the red tip intact for effect. Discard one half.



Make the aircraft by gluing the sliver of wood -
the wing - across the remaining part of the matchstick - the fuselage. If you
want, you can use little scraps to make a tail section. Or you can make a
biplane. Or you can use a couple of thin slices of balsa to make a huge wing,
one that will carry maybe twenty engines. Indulge your aeronautical whims. Think
of lift, think of thrust, think of innovation without the benefit of an
industrial policy.



Catch a bunch of flies. Put them in a jar and put
the jar in the freezer. In a few seconds the flies will be chilled out
completely. This is called cryogenics, and it has its drawbacks. For example,
the flies will be dead flies if you freeze them too long. Dead flies are no
good. So if you're a tinkerer, refrigerate your flies. It takes longer to make
them comatose, but they have a higher recovery rate than the ones you leave in
the freezer next to the burritos.



Meanwhile, put a tiny drop of rubber cement at
each place along the wing where you want an engine.



Take the flies out of the freezer. Attach the
abdomen of one frigid fly to each drop of glue. Make sure all the flies are
facing the same direction.



Breathe life into the flies. A miracle: A gentle
puff of your warm breath will resuscitate the flies.



Launch the aircraft. It should fly like a charm,
and, far from being cruel to the flies, you'll be teaching them a new and
valuable thing, one that brings us to the virtue of this exercise. For we see
that while flies think a lot alike, have a great deal in common, share many of
the same hopes and dreams, they never act in concert, as a team, with regard for
the worth of other, neighboring flies until forced to by grim circumstance - as,
for example, when they are harnessed to fly and either first experience the
exhilaration of high-altitude cooperation or die. Redeemed by such a critical
choice, they'll soar like a glider, race like a Stealth, and, when overflying a
barnyard or kennel, turn into a wicked-awesome dive bomber.



From Yumlum.com

Friday, March 11, 2005

Batman's Boner???

This is a real Batman comic strip from back in the good old days when the word "boner" meant "A blunder or an error".

I thought this was way too good to pass up.









Monday, November 22, 2004

How The Computer Works

Ok, this is a wonderful trip back into time where computers where the size of your car if not house and only had 16 mb hard drives... Circa 1971 and then revised in 1979, this was one of the books I actually read in my High School computer class... CLICK HERE to start your journey...



Saturday, September 04, 2004

Crap once a year!!!

TO THE BATHROOM JUST ONCE A YEAR!

You can with this new pill

By Nick Jeffreys (Weekly World News)

RESEARCHERS are seeking
FDA approval of a new pill that
would mean only one trip to the
bathroom per year.

"We've finally perfected the
Crapper Capsule," says Dr. Colon
Levinson of Australia's Rectum And
Sphincter Center.

"We named it for my hero
Thomas Crapper who invented the
toilet in 1861."

The human body takes in food and
breaks it down in the digestive system.

Nutritional substances are used
as fuel and everything else is eliminated
as fecal matter and urine.

"Most people have one bowel
movement each morning after the
newspaper is delivered," says
Levinson. "A good B.M. can be satisfying,
but having to pee several
times a day can be a nuisance. I
always have to urinate when I'm in
the car or at an important meeting
or in the movie theater. I hate that,
and my colleagues agree. That's why
we decided to do something
about it."

The Crapper Capsule compresses
waste molecules like a
biological trash compactor,
explains Levinson. Once every 365
days, the individual taking the medication
will visit the rest room
and produce a
square block.

"It'll hurt
coming out,"
admits the scientist,
"but after all,
it's just once a year."